Promises & Decisions – a little shout out for help

popular new year resolutions - colorful sticky notes on a cork board

I made a decision this morning.  It’s nothing mind blowing or life changing but a decision that needed to be made and that now having made it I feel lighter, energised and positive.

But, well I am playing it through in my head and I’m wondering if it’s one of the Sunday night/Monday Morning decisions – you know the ones:  This week i am going to be more organised; This week I am going to get through my to do list; This week I am going to eat healthily; This week i am going to get to the gym 4 times; This week, this week this week……

So what is it for me that stops me sticking to my promises to myself?  If I make a promise to someone else I do everything I can to meet their expectations, deliver my side of any promise and not let them down.  So why is it ok to let the promises I make myself slip.

Am I less valuable than that other person?  Is my time worth less, my opinion less important or more disposable?  Is it ok because I can promise it to myself again next week, month, year?

I know how I feel when I complete a project or task for someone. The completer finisher in me gets a high from a job well done and I can have pride (no matter how small or large) in knowing that I did that. I made this or that happen or be better, I helped this person or that achieve what they wanted or needed to .  Yay go me, pat myself on the back and on to the next thing.

Shouldn’t I also be able to do that to myself?

I was reading some old diaries at the weekend, promises I made to myself over the years.  8, 5 and 2 years ago – things I said would change and things I would do and achieve.  And some of it I have.  I can look back with some satisfaction of a job well done and look forward with the knowledge that there’s so much more.  Then there’s the rest – the things I haven’t quite achieved or are still waiting to be done.  Not things that impact others in any great way but things that I know would have an impact on me.  I must know this I made a promise to myself to do them (well several promises if I’m honest).

So I’m looking for insight and advice –

  • what helps you make those promises to yourself stick?
  • What and who encourages you to reach your goals?
  • How do you decide what’s important and how do you treat yourself with the same (respect and) importance as others?

I’d really like to hear your thoughts and get your input.  Thanks

Put up – shut up

When I interviewed for this role I was at the end of a long but not busy contract. It had had other pressures (no respect for HR or women or someone younger) and had been an uphill struggle and lesson in influence and patience. I’m really pleased I did it but I wasn’t sorry to leave.

So at interview I was ready for a challenge, to get my teeth into a role and deliver. Ha! After 18 months of a pretty easy ride it’s been a bit of a shock to the system.

The first few weeks were a gentle intro but the last month has made me challenge my ability to deliver. The project is big, scarily big, and there was no direction or even signposting – just a desk, some background reading and a vague instruction to crack on.

In all honesty it took me about 4 weeks to get past the fear; the inertia. I had a great sit down with the brilliant @dds180 (aka David) and tried to explain where I was – it was just all too vast. He offered some sage advice – ‘what’s the best way to eat an elephant? Piece by piece’.

So I portioned up the elephant and started to deliver. It’s deadline time and there’s been some major challenges (complete change in tender document and template – them, shingles – me). But now it’s time, so I’m working silly long hours (It’s Wednesday and so far this week I’ve done 31 hours).

Deadline looming – time to put up and shut up. Time to deliver and be that person from the interview.

Gulp – I’m heading in. Time to devour that elephant.